Thursday, September 15, 2016

A Decade

Two things about that above photo before I go into the real reason of this post. 1) This photo was taken on the ferris wheel at a fair where we saw Errol's high school Cadillac get smashed up in a demolition derby 2) My brow game is on point. They are literally perfect. Well, besides my wonky right side but it's like that unless I have RBF.

Ten years ago today Errol and I went on our first date. I was 19 and he was 21. We'd talked on the phone the whole week leading up to that Friday but we'd been flirting and spending time together for the last month or so. I remember I tried on all my best outfits and agonized over what to wear. I wore my hair down, which if you know me is a big deal. I sprayed myself with vanilla wearing my green American Eagle sweater and toting my gold sparkly purse. I cringe now just thinking about that outfit. The plan was to meet at Applebee's. I showed up and jumped out of my car to wait in front. I was anxious and nervous. I realized after several minutes of waiting that he was late. That's when I started to get really nervous. Was I being stood up? (Sidenote: I put off getting a cell phone for as long as possible and didn't have one at this time to text and see where he was. I actually didn't end up getting a cell phone until we moved in together and realized that I couldn't call him when he was traveling for work.) He showed up about 15 minutes late and looking back on it now, I realize he must have been just as nervous as I was. Errol is hardly ever late and he told me later that he had gone shopping for a new shirt that day, got a haircut and cleaned his car for the date. He was particularly worried that I would get in his car and think it was gross and dirty which is funny because I remember being worried he'd think my car was a shitbox because I had a Geo Prism with duct tape on the bumper. haha
If someone had showed me that night what the future held for him and I, I wouldn't have believed them. I went into our relationship with no expectations or anything. I'm still in disbelief when I really think about how long we've been together. I didn't meet Errol and know that moment that we were "meant to be". Our love story didn't unfold that way. That's not to say that I didn't fall hard and fast for him. It just happened and I didn't think about it. Even now as I write this post, I get all verklempt just thinking about us and the intense love I feel for him and our relationship. It's overwhelming how much you can love someone. Where will we be 10 years from now? What does that future version of us look like? I might be aloof and I might not always show my love but it's there, always. I might get cranky and wrapped up in everyday life and the details but he is the very best part of everything. I don't want him to ever doubt my love. 

We're not perfect, far from it but we both are committed to the other. That's why we've weathered 10 years together. There's been highs and lows, ebbs and flows but we've chosen each other and we stick together. We've chosen each other as life partners. I continue to choose him everyday. I don't feel "stuck" with him. We've built a life together and still are and I'm so excited to see where that life takes us.

All of this is really just to say, I love you Errol. I've said it all before and there's really no other way to say it. It's plain and simple but it has my whole heart behind it.

3 comments:

  1. An absolutely lovely post about your dedication to one another. Thank you for sharing.

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  2. Love this post.

    I totally believe we continue to choose each other through the ebbs and flows.

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  3. this is so adorable and i just want to squeeze you both! love hearing about how nervous people are when they meet, especially because we don't really find out these things until we are no longer nervous around them. KC was so nervous around me and wanted to impress me so he ate a hot dog because I bought one for him. Not a big deal to most humans, but KC cannot handle hot dogs - they make him start gagging and he despises them.. and he ate one because he didn't want to tell me no lol. so cute. anyway, happiest of 10 years to you all, here's to next 10. choosing is way better than being stuck with :) i always tell KC i'm stuck with him because otherwise i'll get deported haha. which isn't true anyway ;)

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